The Study Group: A College Reverse Harem Romance by Cassie Cole
Author:Cassie Cole [Cole, Cassie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Juicy Gems Publishing
Published: 2020-04-05T16:00:00+00:00
24
Adam
I was an emotional wreck all week. Breaking things off with Sarah was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.
I considered myself a man of strong principles and morals. Professional, academic, and general human decency. Having sex with Sarah violated all of them. She was a student. She was younger than me. We worked together in several capacities. And most importantly, we had an unbalanced power dynamic. I had authority over her. That corrupted every decision either of us made.
Then why did that night in the pantry feel so amazing?
I had never experienced such cognitive dissonance. For the first time in my life my brain and heart were not on the same page. They tugged me in opposite directions.
I smiled politely at Sarah in class, and she smiled back. The weather had warmed enough that she was wearing summer dresses which showed off her smooth legs. I tried to tune her out as I gave my lecture to the class, but it was hard. My eyes were drawn to her the way a piece of metal was drawn to a magnet. I kept wanting to look at her, to smile at her, to ask if she was doing okay.
I wanted to ask if she missed me.
It was a stupid thing to desire. We had one fling. A single night of passion at a college bar. What was there for her to miss?
But the ache in my gut told me I was losing something very dear.
I sleepwalked through my classes that week. Including the engineering one on Wednesday in which Sarah was a student. It was a small class of grad students which made it impossible to ignore her. She kept her face buried in her notes and didn’t ask any questions. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing, or bad.
When I closed my eyes at night I saw Sarah. I dreamed of a future we could have together. Not as student and professor, but as partners. Partners in engineering. Partners in life. I saw us living together. Me cooking dinner while she set the table, then discussing whichever new Intel chipset had just been released.
I saw a future with her, and that terrified me more than anything.
Thursday night I sat in my office with a glass of scotch. I wasn’t much of a drinker, but tonight I felt like I was at my wit’s end. I ran through my conversation with Sarah from Sunday, wondering if I had done the right thing. It simultaneously felt like I had said too much and not enough.
When the scotch had loosened my brain enough I opened my email. I typed, “We need to talk about us,” into the subject, then let my fingers move on the keys.
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